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Writer's pictureHeather Haygood

Love and Parenting: Train a child in the way he should go

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it.”

Proverbs 22:6


Almost everyone who has grown up in church has heard this scripture. I believe that a large majority of people assume that this verse is referring to “Christian” values but considering that the book of Proverbs was written B.C., that is not likely. I believe this verse is referring to the principle of teaching your children proper tools to govern themselves. 


Does that include Christian values? Absolutely. It also includes recognizing your child’s God given gifts, which may be very different from your own, and encouraging them to pursue what is uniquely theirs. There is not a one-size-fits-all approach to parenting, but there are basic principles that we can all benefit from. 


Children learn what they live. If a child lives with criticism, he will learn to condemn others. If a child lives with fear, he will more than likely be too afraid to pursue his dream. If a child is spoiled and pampered, he will probably be very disgruntled and entitled. On the flip side, if a child knows unconditional love, she will be wary of manipulative people and love others without restraint. If a child is encouraged, she will encourage those around her. If a child is raised in a home full of joy, she will inevitably be able to create joy wherever she goes. 


Children throughout history have needed to be equipped with all kinds of different tools for the world they are living in. These vary by country and circumstance. What is important to one generation may be completely irrelevant to another. Our children need to learn discipline maybe more than any generation before them. There is so much abundance in America and so many ways to receive instant gratification. The temptation to live predominantly in an online world that rewards ignorance with little to no accountability for what we say is strong. 


Einstein has been quoted to say, “You have to learn the rules of the game and then you have to play better than anyone else.” What world is your child living in? What tools do they need to be financially successful? What are the universal principles that never seem to change? Thinking in this way has changed my approach to parenting many times over and I ask myself questions frequently. 

Here are a few things that I don’t believe have changed or will ever change. God is the moral compass, not the fickle approval of man. You reap what you sow.


Pursuing money will not guarantee happiness, but pursuing God will bring you peace. The blessing of God will bring prosperity and will not be attached to sorrow. Compassion often brings understanding. Valiant men will always inspire hope. Motherhood is a sacred gift from God and should be treated as such. Children are the true treasure. Humans do not benefit in the long term from overindulgence and selfish gain. The happiest humans are those who share their gifts and abundance with the world. 


In closing I am reminded of another verse from the Bible:

1 For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:

a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;

a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.

 

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8


What is this season asking you to do differently in your home, Mom and Dad?


If you have been enjoying my articles, please visit hshaygood.com and click The Love Journey tab to order your copy of my new book and sign up for my inspirational emails. I keep emails fresh and different from my weekly Globe articles.

“Love is a journey not a destination.”

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