Last week I wrote about letting go in the context of forgiveness. Today, I am sitting in an airport in Rome, Italy. My middle daughter is moving to Florence to study and after spending almost a week helping her to get settled in, I have said goodbye to her until sometime between Christmas and the new year. I put my most brave Mama face on, hugged her and prayed for her then made my way to a little café where I spent a very tearful hour. No, it is not that long, but it is the longest she has been away from home.
This is also not the first time one of my children has moved away. I have now had two daughters study abroad. I am excited for them, and I know that these experiences will inevitably make them more strong, wise and confident. These are all things that I want for them, but the experience is bittersweet. I find myself sitting here reminiscing about her sweet, little fat fingers that used to hold my hand and her love for all things fashion (that hasn’t changed). This is a beautiful season for her and for me.
Letting go of my children so they can see the world gives them an opportunity to flourish and bloom. As mothers we cannot selfishly hold onto them and guilt them into staying close and living the life that makes us feel comfortable. Our job is to teach them principles and let them go.
The act of letting go is also good for me. I am no longer the mother of a little girl. I am the mother of a young woman, and I need to grow into my new role with confidence and faith. I need to have faith that all the prayers I have prayed will be heard and all of the love that I have given will sustain them. I must learn to live without my daughters under my watchful eye 24 hours a day. I don’t like that. I have loved being a mother to all my children and after having done this twice, I’m not sure that I could ever actually be prepared for this season. I am freshly reminded to savor every moment I have with the children still under my roof. I am also reminded not to neglect my own dreams, because we blink, and our babies are adults. Childhood goes by so quickly.
Here I sit in a café in a foreign country where I have kissed my child the last time for a long time. I am perfecting gracefully letting go, so that she can spread her wings and see the world. I’ve loved her, laughed with her and shared her dreams.
Addio ragazzina...Goodbye. little girl.
Che Dio sia con te...May God be with you.
Benvenuta giovane donna...Welcome, young woman.
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